Author: lamkhanh

By Rick Warren – Soucr: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” 1 Corinthians 13:7 (NLT)

Lasting love is persistent. It is determined. It is diligent. It is resolute. It endures the worst and doesn’t give up on a relationship. It’s stubborn!

The purpose of a relationship is not just to make you happy but also to make you holy. Relationships—whether with a spouse or child or even a close friend—teach you to think of others more than you think of yourself. As you persevere with them through difficult times, you will learn certain things that you would never learn any other way.

When my wife and I got married, we discovered that we were complete opposites. We started arguing on our wedding night, and from there, it just got worse. We loved each other, but we did not get along.

But we had made a vow, and we decided divorce was not an option. We said, “We’re going to make this thing work if it kills us”—and it nearly did! We got counseling, even though we were broke. We sacrificed so that we could honor our commitment to each other. We grew up. We struggled for the first two years of our marriage, but we became better through it.

Maybe you need to hear this today: Don’t give up. Keep on. Persevere. Be stubborn. Don’t let go of God’s gift of lasting love because you have to work for it. It will always be worth the fight.

Learning to love is the single greatest lesson in life. It is why God put you on this planet. But it’s not always easy—and it’s just plain hard to love some people.

There really isn’t a “secret” to lasting love. The key, however, is to let God’s love flow through you.

Philippians 2:5 says, “You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had” (NLT). Human love wears out. But having Jesus’ love in you lets you offer lasting love to others.

Open your life to him—and then let him love others through you.

By Rick Warren – Source: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“Love . . . always looks for the best.” 1 Corinthians 13:7 (MSG)

When you have high expectations of someone, you don’t tell it like it is. You tell it like it could be. What does that mean? It’s means you believe in what God wants to do in and through that person, and you affirm God’s purpose for them.

An excellent example of how this works is a story from Bruce Wilkinson, an author and teacher. Years ago, he was a new professor at Multnomah University, and at the first faculty meeting, he received his class assignments. Another professor saw his sheet and said, “Bruce, you’ve been given two of the section A classes. They’re the brightest students in the university. They’re really engaged and a joy to teach. You’re fortunate to have section A students in your first year.”

Bruce discovered that to be true—he absolutely loved teaching those kids. They were so much more fun to teach than the other classes. They were smarter and asked better questions.

At the end of the year, Bruce told his department supervisor, “Man, I sure hope I get the section A classes again next year!” The supervisor told him, “Bruce, there is no section A. We canceled that program six years ago.”

When Bruce went back and checked his grade books, he found that those “section A” classes may not have been advanced placement, but they received higher grades and wrote more thoughtful term papers than his other classes. Bruce realized—because he expected them to be better students—they rose to the challenge.

Throughout your life, you will shape the people around you by your expectations of them. When you expect the best from others, you are reflecting the lasting love of Jesus.

The Bible says that love does not nag or perpetually bring up past mistakes. The apostle Paul said it this way: “Love . . . always looks for the best” (1 Corinthians 13:7 MSG). Lasting love is forward-looking. It’s optimistic.

Lasting love is full of hope.

By Rick Warren – Source: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” Ephesians 4:2 (NLT)

No relationship will survive without grace. You’ve got to cut people some slack! You’ve got to let things go.

The Bible says, “Love patiently accepts all things” (1 Corinthians 13:7 NCV). In the original Greek, this literally means “covered with a roof.” Would you buy a house without a roof? Of course not. You’d have no protection from wind and rain. A roof covers and protects your home.

In the same way, biblical love covers a relationship and lets some things slide. It doesn’t hold people accountable for every little mistake they make. You need a roof on your relationship, because people damage pretty easily, and we need the kind of love that extends grace.

Why is grace essential to relationships?

Because we are all sinners. If you’re married, you married a sinner—and your spouse did too! Two imperfect spouses will never make a perfect marriage. And it’s the same way in friendships. No friendship is perfect—because no friend is perfect! Two imperfect people will never create a perfect relationship.

The Bible says in Romans 3:10, “There is no one who always does what is right, not even one” (NCV). Nobody gets it right 100 percent of the time. It’s never just one person’s fault. We all make mistakes, and there’s always responsibility on both sides. The saying goes, “It takes two to tango.” It also takes two to disagree!

That’s why the Bible says we have to learn to extend grace to each other. Forgiveness is a two-way street. We cannot receive what we’re unwilling to give to other people.

You build strong relationships by treating other people the way God treats you. Romans 15:7 says, “Accept each other just as Christ has accepted you” (NLT). Accepting others may look like listening without judging to a friend or giving space to a tired, grumpy family member.

When you accept others as they are, looking past their faults for the sake of love, that’s extending grace.

By Rick Warren – Source: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that.” Ephesians 5:2 (MSG)

I’ve been on this earth for a while now, and I’m still convicted by God about how little I really know about love. The fact is, we all have a lot of growing to do as we continue maturing in God’s love.

So how do you build a life of real, deep love? You’ll spend the rest of your life trying to live out the answer. But I can give you some steps to get you out of the starting block—five things you can do this week that will help you get on the road to becoming a person of great love.

Learn how mature love acts and responds. Personal change always begins with a change in perspective. You need to get God’s perspective on what love is really like, because the world knows nothing about real, deep love. You gain that perspective by getting into God’s Word.

Start your day with a daily reminder to love. The first 10 minutes of the day set your mood for the rest of the day. Resolve to get up in the morning and say, “God, help me to remember that the most important thing is loving you and loving other people. If I don’t get anything else done today besides loving you and the people that you put around me, then this has not been a wasted day.”

Memorize what God says about love. God’s Word is filled with truths and principles on how to become a loving person. The problem is, when you’re in a situation where you’re tempted to be unloving, your Bible is usually at home on a shelf. That’s why you need to memorize Scripture, so that God can bring verses to mind when you need them the most.

Practice acting in unselfish, loving ways. Love is like a muscle. The more you use it, the more it develops. If you want to become a truly loving person, then you have to intentionally do some things that may seem awkward at first. But the more you practice, the more love becomes second nature, and you become a genuinely loving person.

Get support from other loving people. If you’re just sitting in your room and reading a book, then you’re not going to get very far in learning how to love. You only learn love in connection to others, in the context of community. That’s one of the reasons why a small group is so important! It puts you in situations where you can grow, as you see godly love modeled for you and as you practice serving others in unselfish, loving ways.

You’ll never learn to love by just sitting in solitude. You’ll learn love in relationship with God and with other people.

By Rick Warren – Source: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“Whatever is in your heart determines what you say.” Matthew 12:34 (NLT)

How does God help you with a bad habit of anger? He goes straight to the heart of the problem because it is a problem in the heart.

Anger doesn’t start in your behavior, your background, or your feelings. It begins in the heart.

The Bible says, “Whatever is in your heart determines what you say” (Matthew 12:34 NLT). Our mouths just reveal what we’re really like inside. Sometimes I hear people say something really mean or unkind, and then they say, “Oh, I don’t know what got into me. That’s not like me.”

Oh, yes it is! Your mouth just reveals what’s in your heart. Someone’s harsh tongue reveals an angry heart. When you meet somebody with a negative tongue, you know he’s got a fearful heart. A boasting tongue reveals an insecure heart. A judgmental tongue exposes a guilty heart. And a filthy tongue represents an impure heart.

On the other hand, if you find somebody who’s always encouraging others, she has a happy heart. If he’s always speaking in a gentle way, you know he’s got a loving heart. If she’s able to control her words, you know she’s got a peaceful heart.

Are you satisfied with the words that naturally come out of your mouth? If not, then you need a heart transplant. You need a new heart! David says in Psalm 51:10, “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” (NIV).

The real secret to managing anger is God’s power to change you on the inside. Romans 15:5 says, “May the patience and encouragement that come from God allow you to live in harmony with each other the way Christ Jesus wants” (NCV).

If your heart is crying out, it’s because you haven’t ever fully received the warmth and security of a relationship with Jesus Christ. Jesus can replace a hurting heart with his love. He cares about your pain, and he will help you heal so that your words give life and reveal the hope you have in Christ.

By Rick Warren – Source: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“You made my body, Lord; now give me sense to heed your laws.” Psalm 119:73 (TLB)

It’s hard to love when you’re tired.

That’s right: Your physical condition has a strong impact on your relationships. Having energy makes a big difference!

What happens to your relationships when you’re run down? Things that are usually small issues become big problems. You may be crankier, more defensive, or more critical when you’re low on energy.

If you’re committed to becoming better at loving others, then you need to develop habits that refresh you physically. The Bible teaches many principles for health, but the three most basic are proper rest, a balanced diet, and regular exercise.

Rest. Psalm 127:2 says, “It is senseless for you to work so hard from early morning until late at night . . . for God wants his loved ones to get their proper rest” (TLB). If you are too tired to love your kids, your spouse, or a friend, then your problem is first physical, not spiritual. It’s amazing how much better things look after a good night’s sleep.

Balanced diet. The Bible says, “You made my body, Lord; now give me sense to heed your laws” (Psalm 119:73 TLB). God provides wonderful delights for us to enjoy and savor. We are meant to enjoy food! But he has also given us wisdom to know what and how much is good to put in our body—and what is not. We just need to do it.

Regular exercise. “God has bought you with a great price. So use every part of your body to give glory back to God” (1 Corinthians 6:20 TLB). To overcome fatigue, you must commit to regular exercise. Study after study shows that exercise doesn’t deplete your energy. It actually increases your energy.

God never meant for you to go through life exhausted. When you’re too tired to love others well, take a good look at how much you’re resting, what you’re eating, and how often you exercise. Then make better—and often more difficult—choices to take care of yourself.

You and those you love will only benefit in the long run.

By Rick Warren – Source: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“Physical training is good, but training for godliness is much better, promising benefits in this life and in the life to come.” 1 Timothy 4:8 (NLT)

We’ve been learning about how loving others the way God wants requires developing habits that keep you physically, emotionally, and spiritually renewed.

The Bible says real love “always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails” (1 Corinthians 13:7-8 NIV). You can’t love people that way without God’s help. And you can’t have that kind of power when you’re running on empty spiritually.

You need to watch for signs that you may be headed for spiritual burnout. When that starts to happen, you may feel like nothing is worth the effort; even loving someone else may seem like too much. Or you might start blaming God for your problems.

These signs aren’t unique to you. Even many of the Bible’s great heroes, like David, Moses, and Abraham, did the same things when they were in burnout stages.

How do you maintain spiritual fitness and avoid spiritual burnout? It’s similar to how you stay physically fit: You have to be intentional and disciplined.

When you develop that discipline, the Bible promises that your spiritual fitness will reap eternal benefits: “Physical training is good, but training for godliness is much better, promising benefits in this life and in the life to come” (1 Timothy 4:8 NLT).

No discipline is more important in developing spiritual fitness than spending regular time with God. In fact, the Bible says in 2 Corinthians 4:16 that, even if outwardly your body suffers wear and tear, inwardly you can be spiritually renewed by spending time alone with God. This can take just 10 minutes in your living room chair before your day starts. During that time, you can let God talk to you through the Bible and you can talk to him through prayer.

You need that time alone with God, because the quality of your relationship with God determines the quality of every other relationship you have.

Human love will wear out. But God’s love never does! To love more like Jesus, make your quiet time the number one priority in your day. When you do, your relationships will be transformed by the power of God’s love through you.

By Rick Warren – Source: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back.”  Proverbs 29:11 (NLT)

If you want to tame your temper, you must resolve to manage it.

You have to quit saying, “I can’t control it!” and realize that you can. Just like love, anger is a choice. When you get angry, you choose to get angry. Nobody is forcing you to get angry.

People often say things like, “You make me so mad!” But the truth is that nobody can make you mad without your permission. Anger is a choice, and you must choose to control it if you want to be a loving person.

You have far more control over your anger than you may want to admit. Let me give you an example.

Let’s say you’re at home and you’re in an argument with somebody in your family. Your voices are raised, and you’re getting agitated. You’re upset. All of a sudden, the phone rings, and you answer sweetly, “Hello? Oh, yes! It’s for you, honey!”

What happened? You didn’t want to be embarrassed or have to explain, so you switched your anger off real quick. Anger is highly controllable!

The Bible says in Proverbs 29:11, “Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back” (NLT).

Do you want to be a foolish person or a wise person? How you respond to a situation is your responsibility and yours alone. Anger is a choice.

The time to decide to manage your anger is not when your blood pressure is rising, your adrenaline is shooting into your system, you can feel the flush in your face, and your muscles start to tense.

At that point, you’ve already lost the battle.

Instead, resolve to manage your anger before you go into that meeting or walk through that front door when you get home. Decide this: “Today, I’m just not going to get angry. I’m not going to let things get to me.”

You manage your anger by first resolving—deciding in advance—that you’re going to hold it back.

By Rick Warren – Source: nhulieuthanhkinh.com

“Love means doing what God has commanded us.”  2 John 1:6 (NLT)

Because love should be central to our lives, we need to be sure to understand what love really is.

The Bible says love is a command. God commands that we love each other: “Love means doing what God has commanded us” (2 John 1:6 NLT).

Because God commands you to love, he also gives you the power and ability to do it! That means that love isn’t a feeling—because we can’t always control our feelings. Imagine saying to a crying child: “I command you to be happy!” That wouldn’t work, because we don’t have total control over our feelings. But God commands us to love, so that means we’re able to love.

The Bible says love is a choice. The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 14:1, “Go after a life of love as if your life depended on it—because it does” (MSG). If you “go after” something, that means you make a choice. Love is a choice; you choose to love or not to love.

Many people try to justify a divorce by saying, “I just don’t love my spouse anymore”—as if that’s totally out of their control. But acting in love when you don’t feel like it is actually a higher level of love than when you do feel like it. It’s one thing to love when the flowers are in bloom, but the real test of love is in the winter, when things are not going great. You can choose to love others like God loves you, in spite of how you feel. You can give the other person what they need, not what they deserve.

The Bible says love is a conduct. Love is something you do. The Bible says, “Let us stop just saying we love people; let us really love them, and show it by our actions” (1 John 3:18 TLB).

Every day God puts opportunities around us to demonstrate love. But most of the time, we’re too busy to follow through. How many times have you thought, “I need to make a call; I need to encourage that person at work; I need to help my neighbor,” but then you missed the opportunity because something else came up? Love takes advantage of opportunities to serve others.

The Bible says love is a commitment. The Bible says in 1 John 4:16, “God is love. If we keep on loving others, we will stay one in our hearts with God, and he will stay one with us” (CEV). Your relationship with God is greatly affected by your relationship with other people. If you commit to loving others, then you will stay one in your heart with God, and he’ll stay one with you—because God is love.